LeBron “Are you doing anything after this?” James
Dwight “WERE YOU NOT ENTERTAINED?!” Howard
Kevin “Soon…” Garnett
Kevin “Let’s pretend I’m not an asshole” Garnett
Mo “This isn’t the right sport” Williams
Derrick “Hear no evil” Rose
Derrick “The Darkest Timeline” Rose
Derrick “Okay, enough with the fucking costumes” Rose
Vladimir “Derrick wouldn’t wear this one, would he?” Radmanovic
Joakim “I’m too hungover for that much noise” Noah
Carlos “I’m aware of ‘Gangnam Style’” Boozer
Kent “I’ve also seen that viral video” Bazemore
Kyrie “Have you guys seen ‘Gangnam Style’ yet? It’s hilarious” Irving
Mo “This is better… Wait, nope. Still not right” Williams
DeMarcus “You’re making me wait for the photographer to make Jimmer look tough? This is going to be a while” Cousins
Kris “I bet I can hit Joe Johnson in the dick from here” Humphries
Dirk “I’m constipated with an invisible basketball” Nowitzki
Tyler “Read me a story, Gordon” Zeller
Gordon “Okay, Tyler” Haywood
Mo “Seriously guys? It’s basketball. I play basketball” Williams
Tristan “Goober” Thompson
Marcin “I love being a single parent” Gortat
Kenneth “I think I can kill with these” Faried
Danilo “Am I holding this right?” Gallinari
Quincy “What am I supposed to do?” Miller and Andre “Just look tough” Iguodala
JaVale “I’m gonna dunk them pickaxes” McGee
