“Welp, I guess we’re not having lasagna for dinner tonight.”

“Husband lost his iPhone on vacation. We used find my from my phone and tracked it to its last location. Found it run over.”

“Left my sprinkler on all night.”

“Walking down Kearny in SF heading to North Beach and I got a little bit of good luck slapped on my hand.”

“Found on the edge of a kitchen shelf.”

“Came home to our gate busted in – nothing stolen except my feeling of safety.”

“So it’s gonna be that kinda day huh?”

“My cat sneezed.”

“Came home from vacation to find our fish tank leaked into my floor while we were gone.”

“Bought tickets to see St. Vincent seven months in advance for what was supposed to be the first live show my wife and I have seen without the kids, paid $30 for parking and $20 for some overpriced beers only to see this once we get to our seats.”

“I’m living with a guy who considers this is a clean dish (everything looks like this after he “washed” it)”

“My purse stained my wooden counter top.”

“Neighbor’s tree fell into my back yard.”

“my thesis is due in three days and my computer has decided to do this.”

“Working a 12 hour overtime shift and this happens in the lunch room…”

“My kid got this in her Easter basket. I was confused about why she didn’t want it so I took a bite. It’s soap.”

“Parking lot at Walmart. I’m very sure this ruined someone’s day.”

“Left my water bottle next to a generator…right in front of the exhaust.”

“Made cupcakes for my coworkers after a long week. dropped them getting out of the car. had to carry the box of shame up to the breakroom.”

“Parked for 5 minutes and someone smashed my mirror.”

“The size of these cooked breasts.”

“Dog got too excited seeing my dad.”

“My “new” car I’ve had less than a month now.”

“Spilled milk on my pants—hope no one thought it was something else.”

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