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“PAIN”

“Car at the rec center this morning. Same on the other side, but through both door handles too.”

“Taking a shower for the first time in the house I just bought.”

“Automatic door at work was broken this morning. Walked right into it.”

“Ming the clam was accidentally killed by scientists while they were determining its age, which later turned out to be 507.”

“My online order arrived!”

“My gf of 5 years broke up with me, I took the TV because it was a gift from my grandma, and when installing it in my bedroom at my parent’s place I discover it got destroyed during transit.”

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“I cleaned my NES with Isopropyl alcohol and it wiped the “Nintendo Logo” away.”

“My cat swept my stuff off of the bathroom counter, and now my AirPods are ruined.”

“I saved up for these wheels for a year, waited for three months while they were made, dropped them off to get tyres fitted and then they were ruined in seconds by the tyre fitter, who said it’s because they were “made in Japan”

“CEO of the company I work for, hit my parked car while I was working.”

“We bought a house, and the owners took the toilet paper holder.”

“Thought I bought dark chocolate covered pretzels, they’re just burned.”

“Well, the good news is… it’s still tied down.”

“Just found out my BF of 9 years has been replacing my Adderall with sugar. I’ve been wondering why I’ve been feeling so horrible for the last 6 to 12 months…”

“Freezer was left open all night…”

“Bought a new dessert to cheer up after a long day.”

“We were supposed to close on our first home today. Found a bed bug during the final walkthrough…”

“Noticed this on the way out of the house this morning.”

“Went to the Caribbean to swim in the clear, blue waters.”

“This porta-potty melted.”

“Accidentally put cornstarch instead of creamer in coffee.”

“Lawn guy kicked up a rock.”

“Delivered in the anti-theft box.”

“Was trying to take a shower when I felt something on my foot.”

“Kids = 1, Van = 0”

“Sinkhole Formed in the Middle of my Street.”

“Traffic in rush hour in Egypt.”

“Came home from Date Night with the wife to find a car in my backyard.”

“Thought I was picking a popcorn kernel out of my teeth. It was my filling..”

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