Friday , 24 November 2017

Things Only People Who Work Weird Hours Will Understand

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Getting annoyed when your friends aren’t around to go to the pub at 2 p.m. on Tuesday.

Having to kill massive amounts of time before anyone can come meet you to do anything.

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“Yeah, it’s cool that you can’t meet me until 8 p.m….even though I’m off at 12 and basically have to be asleep by 9 p.m.”

When you see tweets from people who are like, “Yay, so glad it’s FRIDAY!!!” you’re like YEAH WHATEVER.

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HOW NICE FOR YOU.

Any song about Friday playing while you’re at work makes you want to cry.

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Well, I would like to get down with Friday, but I CANNOT.

Only being able to do your grocery shopping at the 24-hour Tesco, at 2 a.m.

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 Those magnificent bags under your eyes.

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Wondering if you have a problem for drinking at 6 a.m. even though you technically just got off work.

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Never knowing what day of the week it is.

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Being a killjoy on a Saturday night because you need to go home and sleep.

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Being a killjoy on Saturday night because you now have to go to work.

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Not even being out on a Saturday night because you’re at work.

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Having a bizarre eating schedule that means you’re ready for lunch at 9 a.m.

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And are ready for second dinner at 9 p.m.

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And it’s basically always SNACK O’CLOCK.

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You feel personally victimised by the song “9-5”.

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When a customer says to you, “Enjoy your weekend!” when you’re clearly working.

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All of the inside jokes and WORK LOLZ happen when you’re out of the office, so you have no idea what anyone is talking about, ever.

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Missing all the big office parties (and every single night out) because you’re holding down the fort while everyone else has fun.

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Missing out on all the big family gatherings on holidays because you’re WORKING.

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 When your grandma gives you shade when you arrive late for Christmas dinner because you were WORKING.

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When your mum makes passive-aggressive Facebook statuses about how great it was “having all the family together” for Sunday dinner and you were WORKING.

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Torturing yourself by checking Instagram when all of your friends are out and you’re WORKING.

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When you sign for a delivery and the postman totally judges you because it’s 4 p.m. and you’re still in your pyjamas and have major Sleep Face.

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Literally never seeing your significant other when they’re awake.

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When you hear people complain about being tired and you’re like, “I’VE BEEN UP SINCE 3 IN THE MORNING”.

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Feeling like you exist in a parallel universe only inhabited by bored paramedics and miserable journalists.

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When you see university students slobbing around town in sweatpants and desperately clutching Frappuccinos and you’re just like, “YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT TIRED EVEN IS, KID.”

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Checking Twitter on your break and the only ones online are people with insomnia or Australians.

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Bank holidays are really just a slap in the face.

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When people totally don’t understand why you can’t just “change shifts” so you can come to their birthday party.

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Feeling like a slob for sleeping until 3 p.m. even though you didn’t get home from work until 10 a.m.

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Trying to sleep when the rest of the world outside is 100% awake and SUPER LOUD.

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So many children crying! So many cars! So many people having their houses renovated! So much DIY! SO MUCH TALKING ON THE STREE

Feeling like you work a lot harder than everyone else because it’s only YOU working on your shift.

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“Can you cover for me while I head out for some food? OH, WAIT, I AM ALONE.”

You are always THAT friend who can never commit to anything because you don’t know your work schedule yet.

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So lonely. 🙁

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