11 Christmas Movies Guaranteed To Make You Horny

Christmas-Movies-Guaranteed

  Bad Santa (2003)

Billy Bob Thornton swears, drinks and fucks non-stop in this fun for the whole family movie.

What’s Sexy?: Billy’s got a sleazy sex appeal and the scene where he has sex in a car with Lauren Graham is one for the history books.
Can You Watch With Your Parents?: You’re kidding, right?

Reindeer Games (2000)

Christmas-Movies-Guaranteed

Ben Affleck assumes the identity of someone he met in prison and beds Charlize Theron.

What’s Sexy?: Ben Affleck in bed with Charlize Theron. Duh.
Can You Watch With Your Parents?: Probably. Sure.

Die Hard (1988)

Christmas-Movies-Guaranteed

Bruce Willis saves his wife and Christmas partygoers from a terrorist.

What’s Sexy?: Bruce Willis’ ARMS for one. And he’s glistening with sweat the entire movie. In that tank top.
Can You Watch With Your Parents?: They’re probably already watching it.

Batman Returns (1992)

Christmas-Movies-Guaranteed

Batman fends off Catwoman and the Penguin as they try to take over Gotham City.

What’s Sexy?: Michelle Pfieffer and Michael Keaton gave you a sexy leather fetish two decades before American Horror Story did.
Can You Watch With Your Parents?: They probably took you to see when you were a kid, they’ll appreciate the nostalgia.

Love Actually (2003)

Christmas-Movies-Guaranteed

A bunch of people fall in love because it’s Christmas or something.

What’s Sexy?: Rodrigo Santoro. Mmmmm.
Can You Watch With Your Parents?: You shouldn’t watch it at all because it’s a lame movie, but if you’re into this sort of thing, whatever.

Mean Girls (2004)

Christmas-Movies-Guaranteed

Lindsay Lohan brings down a group of bullies in her high school so she can hook up with a future cycling instructor at Fly Wheel.

What’s Sexy?: Aaron Samuels’ hair when it’s pushed back.
Can You Watch With Your Parents?: Only if they’re a cool mom.

Go (1999)

Christmas-Movies-Guaranteed

A drug deal gone wrong is told through three intertwining stories.

What’s Sexy?: Shirtless Timothy Olyphant.
Can You Watch With Your Parents?: Not unless you want them to ask you about “the drugs” that you do.

 It’s A Wonderful Life (1946)

Christmas-Movies-Guaranteed

Jimmy Stewart almost commits suicide on Christmas Eve until a guardian angel shows him life is worth living.

What’s Sexy?: The sexual tension in the phone scene between Jimmy and Donna Reed is one of those “only in the ’40s can you get a hard-on from people staring at each other fully clothed” scenes. And when they kiss afterward? Get a towel.
Can You Watch With Your Parents?: This was your grandmother’s original 50 Shades of Grey, so your parents are probably really creeped out by this movie.

Kiss Kiss Bang Bang (2005)

Christmas-Movies-Guaranteed

Val Kilmer plays a suave, gay private investigator that will turn you on like one of those dames in a Raymond Chandler novel.

What’s Sexy?: If Val Kilmer’s not your thing, there’s also Michelle Monaghan dressed up as sexy Mrs. Claus and Robert Downey Jr. being Robert Downey Jr.
Can You Watch With Your Parents?: As long as you tell them it’s “just like Law & Order.”

Lethal Weapon (1987)

Christmas-Movies-Guaranteed

Mel Gibson and Danny Glover fight crime on Christmas and it’s before Mel Gibson started making public racist and sexist rants, so he might just turn you on.

What’s Sexy?: The opening has a shot of Mel’s bare ass. You’re welcome.
Can You Watch With Your Parents?: Yep. They’ll never be too old for this shit!

Gremlins (1984)

Christmas-Movies-Guaranteed

Gremlins take over a small town and terrorize it.

What’s Sexy?: Duh, horror movies get the blood pumping, making you all hot and bothered. And besides, who isn’t turned on by these scaly, miniature demons?
Can You Watch With Your Parents?: They’re probably gonna pass on this.

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