Don’t give people the option to say no if you’re hoping to extract information.
Start your questions with When/Why/What/Who/How and you’ll get longer answers.
If you tell someone you need their help, they are more likely to do what it is you want or need, rather than you telling them to just do it.
If you’re at a house party holding a bottle of beer, don’t hold it up high close to your chest instead hold it lower down below your hip. Body language experts suggest this projects an image of confidence and openness making partygoers feel more willing to socialise with you.
People will usually correct incorrect information. (This works in situations where you need someone to admit to something.)
E.g. “Hey i found your drugs in your x”
“But my drugs are in my y”
Whenever I have a sad, anxious, depressing or generally unpositive thought I (as quickly as I can, hopefully interrupting the other thought) think of Samuel L. Jackson saying “I don’t remember asking you a goddamn thing” all pulp fiction style. Works surprisingly well.
Kill them with kindness.
Works way more than I would have thought. Been using this is at various jobs since I was 16. Nothing makes a sh#tty boss more frustrated that they can’t do anything more then when an employee is nothing but kind to their negative attitudes.
Service industry trick: I rarely say sorry to a customer when I make a mistake, instead saying “thank you for being patient with me” or something along those lines. Instead of focusing on your error you’re bringing attention to how the other party is great for putting up with you.
Get people to contribute to an idea and they will be more likely to accept it. Studies show that it doesn’t take that much involvement in the creative process to get people to take possession of a proposed plan.
In my experience with retail, a little kid who won’t let go of a toy will happily just hand it over if you say “wowee, that’s really cool. Can I see?”.
Stare at someone’s forehead when in conversation if you want to intimidate them. Stare at their lips to suggest your interested in them.
If you are trying to reassure a person, never say “Everything will be fine.” A person understands that everything will be fine in the future, but he expects a result at the moment so it’s better to support him otherwise.
Let’s say you want to play rock, paper, scissors and win. If, when you ask a person to play, you hold your hand in the shape of the scissors and shake it up and down so that they see it. The person you are playing will more likely choose rock on the first game because they think you will pick scissors.
Instead of telling someone to calm down, which often only makes people more upset, say something along the lines of “you don’t have to be calm” or “i understand why you’re upset.” this validates how they are feeling and makes them feel heard, and it often can help them calm down.
If you don’t want/like the response you were given just be completely quiet leaving a long pause. This usually makes the other person uncomfortable and they will start changing their answer (often in a favorable direction). Works over phone and in face to face conversations.
If you greet someone cheerfully, it’s likely they will do the same after some time, then interpret that their reaction is due to liking you, so there is a chance they will like you.
You can’t blink and smile at the same time..
Tell them that if you want someone to smile
I don’t remember the official name, but I call it the “what color is your shoe?” trick. The idea is that if a child is having a meltdown, you catch them off guard by throwing in a random question. Their brain has to shift gears, away from the irrational melting down side and back to the rational, “huh, what color are my shoes?” I’ve used it, it works great.
Figure out group dynamics by telling a joke! If person A looks at person B to see their reaction, there’s a good chance person A looks up to/is in love with/otherwise searching for approval from person B (kind of like getting “permission” to laugh at the joke)
I work in retail so I like to mimic their movements. It usually adds to bigger and better sales.
You can handle anything for at least 10 seconds. When that 10 seconds is up, you just have to start a new 10 seconds.
When someone says something you already know, say, “You’re right,” instead of “I know.” It acknowledges what the other person said, and you’re much less likely to come across as a condescending know-it-all.
Nod slightly while talking to get someone to agree.