Life

"From So Focused And Organized And Together To Googling “What Day Is It?” And “Can Parenthood Kill You?”"

"Putting my clothes in my closet with the hangers reversed once a year. As I pull clothes out, I reverse the hanger. Every year I give away any clothes that I never took out."

“Seeing how they speak to other people, especially when they aren’t around, if they s@#t talk their friends when they aren’t around why would you think they wouldn’t do that to you as well.”

"My Grandma has played Wii Fit everyday for over 10 years!"

“20 years on. Family is everything. Merry Christmas everyone.”

"This poor chicken got a “get well soon” card."

"The top part of the body comes off. Whoever designed this packaging deserves all of the money."

On hot days, it’s better to not use devices: they heat the air, which is already hot enough. Instead of watching TV at home, go to the movies where there are air conditioners.

“I use an apple corer to prep my roast potatoes.”

“My student’s teeny tiny pencil.”

When they act like everybody has the same 24 hours in a day. Like, oh OK, how many hours did you spend at the laundromat last week? Or how many hours did you spend on the bus?

This trick can save your life. Build your own floating device using your pants. Once you get your pants off, you're gonna tie the two ends of your pants together like this, zip up or button up your pants...

It’s easy to peel baby carrots by rolling a regular sheet of foil into a ball and rubbing the vegetable with it.

"Today my wife is officially under 200 lbs and I was finally able to do a chin-up for the first time in my life."

This teacher wore anatomy bodysuit to teach science class...