Barnorama All Fun In The Barn
I was told that I have nice legs by some random guy that didn’t have legs at Wal-Mart once.
“You rock two black eyes and a broken nose better than anyone I’ve ever seen. Your bruise matches your dress.”
“90% of women you meet won’t like you. But the ones that do are gonna be obsessed with you and hang on your every word. You have the charisma of a cult leader.”
Something like that. I still don’t know what to think of that.
Walking around on a campus, some (drunk? high? totally sober?) guys were passing and one of them said “you look like you have a big d@#k”, to which another responded “that’s a girl”, so the first guy said “sorry you look like you have a big strap” and kept walking
That I smelt like doughnuts. This was from a very drunk man who was taken by my vanilla perfume, and then proceeded to bring all his friends over to sniff me…
Were you a cesarean baby? Because you have the nicest shaped head.
Your nipples are the most erect I’ve ever seen.
“Is that a guy or a girl? Damn either way”
At an airport an employee said, “You look like you should be somebody.” After I said something like “Thanks…I think,” he then clarified that he meant like an athlete or actor. I do think it was meant as a compliment, but since then I’ve been haunted by the feeling that I haven’t lived up to my potential.
That I look like my dad in a dress.
Have been riding horses for 18 years.
“On the ground sometimes you’re kinda awkward and lanky, but on a horse that all goes away.”
Alrighty then.
“You have nice goat birthing hands.”
“You have the perfect voice for narrating audiobooks. Your voice puts me right to sleep”
My OB/GYN, in the middle of my Papsmear, said, “you have a wonderful pelvic floor.”
I wasn’t sure what to say, but my brain went on auto and said, “thank you”. He just nodded and continued the exam.
“You’re pretty good at boning.” — My dad… after a fishing trip when we’re cleaning the fish.
“You look like you could beat a door down,” in response to asking how a pair of shorts looked.