Was That A Compliment?

“I work retail and was told this by a customer, “you’re so nice, you must have been bullied in high school.””


“During an internal ultrasound, I once got told I have beautiful Fallopian tubes. I’ve been riding that high for years.”


“My friends and I were talking about what kind of potatoes we’d be. One of my best friends told me, “You’d be a loaded baked potato. People pay extra for that good s@#t!””


““You look comfortable.”

Not as in I looked relaxed. She meant I looked comfortable to rest, lean or lay on. At first I asked if she was politely saying I was fat. She explained that I had a look about me of being someone who would comfortable to cuddle with and not hog space or covers.

I took it as a compliment. I hope it was. This was a stranger I was having a conversation with during the morning train commute maybe three years ago. Came from out of the blue, as well.”


“That I’m like a piece of furniture, don’t do much but you notice when I’m not there.”


“Someone told me my eyes were upside down.

Not sure what the means or if was even a compliment, they seemed friendly.”


“A coworker once told me that I was “a cross between Han Solo and Dr. Bunson Honeydew from the Muppets.” This was in 1998 and I still can’t stop thinking about it – was that supposed to be a compliment? An insult?

The worst part is that he was pretty accurate, actually.”


“You remind me of a swan.”


“Every time I see her, my gynecologist always says, “You have such a CUTE little cervix!” I’ve had a bf blushingly tell me I have a “really cute butthole, don’t make it weird.”

So I got that going for me.”


“Your penis is harder than old chicken.”


“It took me a couple decades to realize guys like you are the best”.


“You look like an anime character!”

“Wow, thanks, that’s a great compli-“

“Yeah, like that show Hellsing! With all the vampires!”


““You’d look great in an off-shoulder dress”.

I’m a guy, but if I ever want to start wearing dresses, I know I’ll choose off-shoulder ones.”


““You look…. ominous.” – the mailman said to me while I sat on the curb reading TIME magazine waiting outside my apartment for the mail to arrive.”


““You finally look like a human being”

It happens every time I get a haircut lol.”


“From a teacher: You’re like a barb-wired fence, maybe something gets past you, but it leaves tattered pieces behind. (I’m not very attentive, but somehow I manage to pick up info I need and use it appropriately)”


“You’re so sexy. You reminded me of my mum.”


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