“If you weren’t related to your relatives, would you be friends with them?….if no, then why does it matter so much to you what they think?”

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"From So Focused And Organized And Together To Googling “What Day Is It?” And “Can Parenthood Kill You?”"

Bonus: A photographer left a camera trap in the woods and a stranger couldn’t resist the temptation to pose for it...

"I want to wake up as a kid in 1972 again but remember everything I know now."

"Why did NASA train oil drillers how to be astronauts when they could’ve just trained astrounats to drill oil in Armageddon (1998)?"

"Putting my clothes in my closet with the hangers reversed once a year. As I pull clothes out, I reverse the hanger. Every year I give away any clothes that I never took out."

"They asked me what kind of vegetable best describes me and I said “a banana.”"

Ashton Kutcher as Steve Jobs in Jobs...