Crazy

"It was the first time I got an order for a dog’s portrait. Usually, I only paint cats but after having seen this photo, I thought, “Yep, I should accept this order!”

"When Customers Leave Stuff From Other Aisles In Places They Shouldn't Be"

"I went snorkeling in Coron, Philippines in the shallow waters just enjoying the reefs. When I went back on the boat I felt something heavy inside my shorts. I thought it was just water caught up in there, so I shook my shorts and a snake fell out. I freaked out but my sister was able to take a picture of the (venomous) coral reef snake before it went back into the water."

Criminal defence (Canada). Talked to a client in cells. Said that she was hanging out at her baby daddy’s and then, as she was leaving, the cops came and harassed her, so she resisted, and that is why she is in jail.

Contestants In The Miss Lovely Eyes Beauty Pageant In Florida Wearing Masks To Obscure The Rest Of Their Faces, 1930

Wearing gloves in kitchens is a goddamn lie. They don't offer any sort of protection, they're actually more prone to spreading germs and filth because people don't wash them between touching different kinds of food. They exist to give the illusion of safety and professionalism.

“My mom managed to open a coconut without breaking the meat of the kernel.”

“During college I was completely wasted and ended up leaving a covenience store as 2 guys walked in to rob it.”

"Can you smell what The Rock is cookin?"

Seriously. Someone would wipe the king’s @$$. And it was a respected position."